[FredSavage]

You just simply say, "Damn excema, excema all over my penis. Oh, is this not calamine lotion, I could have sworn this KY personal masturbation jelly was Calamine lotion, oh well...

...I guess your right, that girl does have a penis, wow, I could have sworn this was straight porn, damn trannys"

[jayrico]

Well I'm into erotic asphyxiation so it would be hard to explain the noose and me being fully naked covered with vaseline.

[jayrico]

Dave Attell on Getting Caught Masturbating

What do you do when you get caught masturbating? Well, here’s a little tip. First, look surprised. And don’t worry, you will be surprised. And then say this: “Quick get some help! My hand and my penis are fighting!”

[dubie monster]

There was a Samoan kid on my football team in college that got caught wacking in the computer lab. The funny thing was is he was from Samoa, and he couldnt go home, so he had that stigma for his entire college career.

Did I mention that I'm Samoan?

[KnockoutsGalore]

Chump

[Mr. Omoplata]

Originally Posted by dubie monster

There was a Samoan kid on my football team in college that got caught wacking in the computer lab. The funny thing was is he was from Samoa, and he couldnt go home, so he had that stigma for his entire college career.

Did I mention that I'm Samoan?

You mean the stigma of being a normal man who needs to bust a nut like normal men do?

[hAYN JJ]

Originally Posted by JGonzo13

Circumstantial but stop and finish later.

For sure finish later...

[hAYN JJ]

Originally Posted by FredSavage

...I guess your right, that girl does have a penis, wow, I could have sworn this was straight porn, damn trannys"

Hahahaha... Great'Ness!

[Cafu]

if its somebody you dont know just finish up and later inform them that you suffer from tourettes.

[rotten apple]

i yell "look what i can do!" at them.