The New Standard - Page 52

bacon · 07-01-2007, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by woogie12

Sounds like a fantastic time.

It was. Almost as fun as.....wait....I'll save that for later.

Bamaispriceless · 07-01-2007, 02:41 AM

Bacon is the fucking man. I wish I was as dumb/brave as Bacon is about practical stunts. I have already been in the back of a cop car for a very average practical joke, so I must have bad luck.

bacon · 07-01-2007, 02:52 AM

I did most of the shit I post about when I was a minor. God, I hope no one ever tries this shit. I had a charmed fucking childhood. I should be either dead or in prison. Spend your youth studying and learning how to manage your money instead of doing the shit I did. You'll thank yourself when you're older.

There are plendy of fuckups like me to keep you entertained with dumbshit stories of jackassery.

woogie12 · 03:04 AM

Hmm...I've had way too many of those and I'm only 19. Let's see, for one, I like to get drunk and break sideview mirrors off of cars. One night I teeped one off a jeep, the threw it through the back windshield of this mercedes. Good times (I'm a fucker).

bacon · 07-01-2007, 03:07 AM

As I exited a pool hall in Missouri, a friend of mine said, "Hey....I wanthat mirrer" as he pointed at the side view mirror of a parked blue ford escort. I laughed and grabbed it like I was gonna rip it off and then continued to get into the car....until he said, "Damn man....you're a bitch now..." PAUSE

I was still in the military at this point in my life. My wife-to-be was looking at me like she just got a glimpse of someone I used to be, and I was torn between the love of my life and my best friend thinking I had lost the magic that once impersonated an officer of the law and stole 8 drivers licenses in one night....

PLAY
I grabbed that fucking mirror without hesitation and ripped it the fuck off the car like I was ripping my friends head from his shoulders for implying that I had become bitchified. I threw the mirror into the backseat and we drove off. Seconds later my woman would realize what had just happened.....then "el mexicana" came out to play. She ripped me a new asshole for vandalism...then she noticed I had cut my hand during my little fit of destruction....so she quickly reverted back to "bonita senorita" and started caring for my wound.

I too, am also el fucker.

ghostwipe · 07-01-2007, 03:16 AM

*jumps out of a big party cake wearing a glittery thong*

Hey... where did everyone go?

Bamaispriceless · 07-01-2007, 03:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bacon

I did most of the shit I post about when I was a minor. God, I hope no one ever tries this shit. I had a charmed fucking childhood. I should be either dead or in prison. Spend your youth studying and learning how to manage your money instead of doing the shit I did. You'll thank yourself when you're older.

There are plendy of fuckups like me to keep you entertained with dumbshit stories of jackassery.

That's great advice about the studying and learning how to manage money.

Your stories are awesome, you should share more

.

woogie12 · 07-01-2007, 03:21 AM

Bacon, I like you man.

(In a total heterosexual way, unlie ghostwipe)

woogie12 · 07-01-2007, 03:23 AM

Oh, and bacon, peer pressure always gets the mirrors to come off.

bacon · 07-01-2007, 03:24 AM

*Blows noise maker, noise maker gets pissed and leaves*

Sp anyways...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Standard

I would be lying if i said i wouldn't hit it, even though she needs an increase in cupsize and has a bad farmers tan going on

*in engllish accent*

I say, Standard. This woman is in need of new wardrobe. I'm affraid she should never be seen in a blue jeans...yes, yes. It's settled. She should wear a dress, or nothing at all....I happen to have nothing at all in my log...