[Mr. Sinister]

Just out of curisity Graedy, do you do any sort of mental/spiritual practices that keep your mind centered? As hokey as it sounds, things like Zen are notorious for their ability to promote relaxation through illnesses like this, and the recovery process in-general. Also slower-moving and more internal-focus Martial Arts like Tai Chi have done good things for terminal Cancer patients and such.

[graedy]

The mother of a very good friend of mine, does stuff like that as a professional. She has taught me several techniques and at the moment she works with "healing-hypnosis". Sounds strange but its really interesting and seems to help. She says, that we will have the UC under control untill march (or even earlier). I "work" with her for over one year now and from the beginning she told me, that it will take a lot of time, but that its possible to get it under complete control. At the moment i have to train to put myself in a slight trance. I found all that stuff very strange in the beginning but i think i wouldnt have kept on fighting till today without it. When it was really bad, the only hours i could sleep was after she had given me a "treatment".

[Tornado]

Healing-hypnosis is part of psychoneuroimmunology, which is a legitimate tool for treating people unresponsive to conventional methods. Stick with it dude but figure out what she's doing and learn to get yourself in that relaxed healing state at all hours of the day. It's weird shit, only because we have a hard time explaining it but the science is there. This stuff isn't vodoo.

[JP]

Been following the thread for a while, but havent felt worthy enough to respond. I really admire your courage, you have a ton of mental strength. It didnt seem like breaking up with your longtime GF affected you that much, or you just havent said. If anyone deserves to get better its you, so good luck man!

[graedy]

Well, i phone with my exgirlfriend about every second day. We had and still have a very close realtionship. For now all i can do is wait. But when im in remission (i still believe this day will come) i gonna reconquer her. Thats for sure
Over the past year my whole life, everything i loved to do etc. was taken away from me piece by piece. I could watch my life getting fucked up but could do absolutelly nothing against it. So many hopes were destroyed and i had to keep on going. So its quite hard to shock me today.

[graedy]

Did a Dumbell-complex with my 15 kg dumbells today.
8 reps each: bent over laterals, alternating single arm curls, bent over rows, OHP, walking lunges, shrugs
3 sets with 2 mins rest in between. My heart was about to explode (anemia ;)) and it was quite hard on the forearms.

I cant wait unti im fine again and can do stuff like barbellcomplexes and 20 rep squats. thats exactlly the stuff i like. Your body says stop! but you keep on going.

[graedy]

BAd night again. Bloodwork was quite good: CRP 5,7 HB 10,5 (13 would be alright, 15-16 normal).


Dumbell complex 8 reps, x 3, 2 min rest: BO laterals, alternating curls, BO Rows, OHP, Lunges, upright rows, RDL, shrugs (3x80=240 reps)

3rd set was hard on the grip. Heart could handle it better today although i added 3 exercises. Wanna add a 4th set next time. then i gonna try to reduce the rest to 1 min. Thats gonna be harder than you may think.
I plan on doing some Bw stuff on wednesday and this complex on friday again.

[graedy]

BW: 82-83 kg. Cortison 10-0-15. 7-8 times to toilette.
-Pushups on the push up bars palms facing 1 set to failure (34)
-reverse to failure (15) [normally i can do more, but i was so gassed from the 34 reps before]
-chins to failure (15)
-pull ups to failure (10) [its strange. i could always do more pull ups than chins. now its the other way arround]


I didnt feel very good and was breathing hard for many minutes ----> my body is fucked.

Friday i go for my DB complex again (4 sets this time).
I would like to take a walk outside. But: no toilette - no graedy.

My Ex-Gf visited me today. I still love her and she still seems to love me. But im semi-dead and she plays in a different league now. Sometimes i wish i would not be just semi.

[bacon]

Keep your chin up man. You inspire me.

[graedy]

I gonna keep the chin ups up . Thx.

Dumbell complex x 4 (had to eliminate BO laterals and curls on the last set. Next time i gonna start with squats instead of BO laterals (15 kg is to taxing for this exercise for a complex) and maybe move the BO laterals to BW-day as a normal exercise (i just love them, dont blame me ).

It is pretty certain, that my colon is irreversible damaged. The question is: How much?
The doc said, that it helps to train the constrictor to get the stool-incontinence under control.
Sounds weird.
But sometimes a man got to do what a man got to do !

Im off for some constrictor-flexes