I cant stand my sisters boyfriend

CanadianRedneck · 09-30-2007, 10:34 PM

My sisters has a new boyfriend. Of all the people I know or have ever met, he is easily in the top 5 of my least favourite. He is a "family friend" , meaning his mom and my mom have been friends forever. We were forced to "be friends" since we could walk, and I cannot recall a friendly thought toward him. He is always trying to compete with me, like we have a big rivalry going or something. I am not very competitive, and I find his behaviour very irritating.

He came over 2 days ago to pick up some stuff for my sister, and was his usual self, making brilliant jokes taking shots at me and laughing like something was funny. I am not exaggerating, I was so angry I literally could not speak. I have never in my life wanted to hit someone, but it was all I could do not to take a swing at him. I could not have looked very friendly, but he carried on until I walked away. I think my dog has better social skills.

I am very close to my sister, and this is really bothering me. I cannot imagine what she see's in him.

Thoughts? Suggestions? How have you guys handled simular situations?

Crono7 · 09-30-2007, 10:37 PM

Are you bigger then he is? use your size as an intimidating factor

NHB7 · 09-30-2007, 10:42 PM

More details....

Older sister, or younger sister.

How long have they been dating?

How old is your sister (if she is like 16 this will last a good month).

Does anyone in your family like this guy?

Thus far my advice is to hold back. The more families tend to express more dislike for one of their family members significant others, the more that person feels a need to defend and be loyal to that person. When she finally comes and complains, don't be vitriolic about the guy, say, "Well, that seems like a tough situation. I hope it works out, but you are such a great girl, I always thought you could do better than him anyway!" In a smiling bortherly sort of way.

DeathNTaxes · 09-30-2007, 10:43 PM

This is just going to fester until you clear the air. The next time he does something you don't like ask him if you could speak to him in private (if your with other people). Pick one thing and have a couple of examples of when it happened and just be straight up with him man to man.

"Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something"
"Hey, I don't appreciate it when you...."
"I know you're just joking but it gets on my nerves, I would really appreciate it if you stopped making jokes like that."

If he gets defensive just keep pointing out that you're not trying to be an ass or "call" him out or anything but you just want to let him know this stuff isn't cool for you and you've been uncomfortable with how to handle it because you guys are "buds" and he's dating your sister. Let him know you will be more straight forward in the future about what you don't like. If he's a cool dude he should be cool and respect your shit and apologize to you.

You need to let him know what your boundaries are. If he doesn't take it the right way and freaks out then you know he's an ass. Fully expect him to tell your sister about it and your families and bend it out of shape. That however is the risk you take for standing up for yourself. Just stay calm and don't let the emo take over you.

Good luck.

Rinksterk · 09-30-2007, 10:45 PM

You have three options:

1. Don't hate him
2. Fuck him up with your muay thai skills if you have any
3. Engineer a brilliant scheme to sever ties with your family and his.

NHB7 · 09-30-2007, 10:48 PM

Does your sister get along with your parents?

I agree with Deathntaxes too. I would say those things in as diplomatic a way as possible right in front of your sister and him next time he does it. If he flies off the handle, your sister will see you were being polite and he is an ass.

Crono7 · 09-30-2007, 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeathNTaxes

This is just going to fester until you clear the air. The next time he does something you don't like ask him if you could speak to him in private (if your with other people). Pick one thing and have a couple of examples of when it happened and just be straight up with him man to man.

"Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something"
"Hey, I don't appreciate it when you...."
"I know you're just joking but it gets on my nerves, I would really appreciate it if you stopped making jokes like that."

If he gets defensive just keep pointing out that you're not trying to be an ass or "call" him out or anything but you just want to let him know this stuff isn't cool for you and you've been uncomfortable with how to handle it because you guys are "buds" and he's dating your sister. Let him know you will be more straight forward in the future about what you don't like. If he's a cool dude he should be cool and respect your shit and apologize to you.

You need to let him know what your boundaries are. If he doesn't take it the right way and freaks out then you know he's an ass. Fully expect him to tell your sister about it and your families and bend it out of shape. That however is the risk you take for standing up for yourself. Just stay calm and don't let the emo take over you.
Good luck.

I wouldn't do this, the other guy acts toug because he knows you arent doing anything about it, tell him to F3CK of, telling him that he hurts your feeling makes you look like a pussy

JSN · 09-30-2007, 10:59 PM

just beat his ass, and say he treats your sis like shit. even his mom won't be able to blame you. "she'll just be like, well, _____ was banging his sister."

marioh · 09-30-2007, 11:06 PM

"Accidentally" hit him with a blunt object.

Trasher · 09-30-2007, 11:11 PM

Try to talk to him man to man, if he resists are shoves you w/e......Duke it out man to man.