[bigsexy02]

dont do it if you dont what to is your life not your parents

[chardog]

Originally Posted by freestyle raw

true but thats kinda weak


where are all the "man up" preachers on this one?

shouldnt he man up and take responsibility for his own finances?

you're idea of man up is confused with fiscal wrecklessness. IMO, wrecklessly spending all the money you have instead of swallowing you're pride is not manning up. It may be perceived as societal norm, but it's retarded. Bobby is not capable of bringing home the butter, so he needs a long term plan.

Ditching a long term plan to fit is societal norm is not manning up.

[Oblivian]

Originally Posted by chardog

you're idea of man up is confused with fiscal wrecklessness. IMO, wrecklessly spending all the money you have instead of swallowing you're pride is not manning up. It may be perceived as societal norm, but it's retarded. Bobby is not capable of bringing home the butter, so he needs a long term plan.

Ditching a long term plan to fit is societal norm is not manning up.

I've stayed out of this debate for a while. From an outsider's view, here is my take. I didn't read this entire thread but I got the impression that your stance among others was to "man up" and take responsibility by having the child and getting married. This logic goes with the thinking, "What is best for the child?" An explanaition would be people argue that the child would fair best with a mom and dad as husband and wife. The same goes with Bobby getting helped out financially. This isn't about making Bobby's life easier, but it's to make the child's life better.
With that being said, if you read my above posts, I think Bobby is pathetic. He is not capable of being financially responsible? He needs to be taking on two jobs right now while he looks for a CAREER. He needs to rethink posting about such personal matters. If his "future wife" reads his previous posts, she'd probably divorce his dumbass. He needs to grow up.
Personally, I don't think he's responsible enough financially or personally to have a kid at this moment. But shit happens. If he wants to have the kid, he will. If he wants to get married, he will. Hopefully he changes his life around for the kid's well being.

[chardog]

Originally Posted by Oblivian

I've stayed out of this debate for a while. From an outsider's view, here is my take. I didn't read this entire thread but I got the impression that your stance among others was to "man up" and take responsibility by having the child and getting married. This logic goes with the thinking, "What is best for the child?" An explanaition would be people argue that the child would fair best with a mom and dad as husband and wife. The same goes with Bobby getting helped out financially. This isn't about making Bobby's life easier, but it's to make the child's life better.
With that being said, if you read my above posts, I think Bobby is pathetic. He is not capable of being financially responsible? He needs to be taking on two jobs right now while he looks for a CAREER. He needs to rethink posting about such personal matters. If his "future wife" reads his previous posts, she'd probably divorce his dumbass. He needs to grow up.
Personally, I don't think he's responsible enough financially or personally to have a kid at this moment. But shit happens. If he wants to have the kid, he will. If he wants to get married, he will. Hopefully he changes his life around for the kid's well being.

the thing about marriage and raising a child is that it really changes your perspective on things. Nobody is really prepared on raising a child. You may be prepared financially, but you are not prepared psychologically or emotionally. Bobby may not seem mentally capable of raising the child, but plenty of people seem as if they are not mentally capable. It's one of those things that you just got to make the best of your situation.

You are forced with a set of responsibilities. Some people fail, some deal with it and adapt. I have an uncle that was set financially, but he was an epic failure with his children. He became a walking wallet with his 4 kids.

[LozanoJ1985]

Originally Posted by bobbylight

Basically, my parents have been pressuring me to do this.

Dont do it because you will eventually get divorced

[freestyle raw]

Originally Posted by chardog

you're idea of man up is confused with fiscal wrecklessness. IMO, wrecklessly spending all the money you have instead of swallowing you're pride is not manning up. It may be perceived as societal norm, but it's retarded. Bobby is not capable of bringing home the butter, so he needs a long term plan.

Ditching a long term plan to fit is societal norm is not manning up.

your confused, i just meant make him stand on his own two feet

[chardog]

manning up is taking care of his wife and kid. It doesnt make much difference if he lives with his parents or move out.

if he lives off his parents, not only will he have an immediate baby sitter, but he will save a lot of money.

the other option is for him to move out. With his current income, he can qualify for government assistant. His wife/gf is elgible for WIC right now, and he can get government funded medical, food credit (formerly stamps), and section 8 housing once the kid arrives.

In either case, there is someone helping him, either your tax dollars or his parents. I'd rather his parents took care of his bills than big brother. He does not make enough money to "stand on his feet"

"standing on your feet" is not the same as manning up and taking responsibility for his actions.

[freestyle raw]

Originally Posted by chardog

manning up is taking care of his wife and kid. It doesnt make much difference if he lives with his parents or move out.

if he lives off his parents, not only will he have an immediate baby sitter, but he will save a lot of money.

the other option is for him to move out. With his current income, he can qualify for government assistant. His wife/gf is elgible for WIC right now, and he can get government funded medical, food credit (formerly stamps), and section 8 housing once the kid arrives.

In either case, there is someone helping him, either your tax dollars or his parents. I'd rather his parents took care of his bills than big brother. He does not make enough money to "stand on his feet"

"standing on your feet" is not the same as manning up and taking responsibility for his actions.

i think it is, his parents are taking care of his responsibilities, he has no options but to take care of his responsibilites by "being there".........where else would he be?

[Goodfoot]

Ya gotta ask yourself. Do you want to be a father or a baby daddy?

[S_walker10]

Originally Posted by DrSatanDracula

Yeahbee:



It's a very telling rejection. When you marry a woman you make her family. You make your son or daughter family, too. When you aren't married to the mother, you're making a pretty big point of rejecting her and her offspring through you. This is the entire concept of illegitimate children.

Moreover, it is highly doubtful that he is going to take care of and love his woman if he isn't going to man up and marry her. Any relationship with a woman you won't marry after you impregnate you likely think you are "not ready" and therefore things start getting put off and off...and poof. It's gone.

A man lives by integrity. That's how you go about things.

You're an idiot. With a 50%+ divorce rate it would be totally stupid to rush into marriage or "man up" as you say. If they guy doesn't want to marry the girl, then he shouldn't.