[Happy Boy]

Double

[AdamG]

Originally Posted by Happy Boy

You said she is the one, so when you say your vows before the Lord you will mean them. This is the right option, its not for saving face before people, who cares what they think, its about doing what is right before the Lord, it was wrong to go the way you did as Im sure you now know that, but as I said you have a chance to make some amends now do the right thing.

Ignore any talk of abortion, so much wrong with that, not only is it hugely immoral, its the weakest and most limp wristed thing you can do. This is a situation which you guys created, to decide on the immoral escape option is truly cowardly so don't even entertain that.

So he should get married before the Lord or else the Lord's followers will judge him? That sounds so righteous I think I might go to church this Sunday.

Who judged him? You did, by saying he did this the wrong way and that he now has to make amends. I like the idea that he shouldn't care what other people think - but then you go and tell him you think he's wrong.

Abortion is immoral to the Church - this I know, but did you ever ask yourself why? So that the followers of the church will go home and churn out more Catholics/Christians/Jews/Muslims/etc.

[Happy Boy]

Originally Posted by Valiss

This isn't the 1950's. Marriage and having sex have nothing to do with eachother. You just do what you need to take care of your kid and the ones you love. If you guys live eachother then marry her, if you are not ready then rushing it will just lead to divorce.

Whats changed since the 1950's?

[Happy Boy]

Originally Posted by AdamG

So he should get married before the Lord or else the Lord's followers will judge him? That sounds so righteous I think I might go to church this Sunday.

Who judged him? You did, by saying he did this the wrong way and that he now has to make amends. I like the idea that he shouldn't care what other people think - but then you go and tell him you think he's wrong.

Abortion is immoral to the Church - this I know, but did you ever ask yourself why? So that the followers of the church will go home and churn out more Catholics/Christians/Jews/Muslims/etc.

No, I'm saying he should do whats right before the Lord and not care what his family think or friends of the family or neighbours or whatever. It has nothing to do with what anyone else thinks.

I didn't judge him, I have my own faults and am in no position to pass it on to others. According to the Christian position he has erred, which Im sure he knows, I wasn't giving my opinion on what he did but the Christian one, which is what I know Bob lays claim to be, hence why I said it.

I'm not going to address your last point, its an asinine thing to say.

[Stringer Bell]

You fucked up and created a baby, now the baby's happiness is more important than your's. children have a better life if they grow up in a 2 parent household, which means you may be miserable but your child will be better for it.

It sucks to be you, but it does make sense. Just moving in together will not cut it, because either of you are free to leave at anytime; there has to be a binding committement.

*2 cents

[DeathNTaxes]

You sir need to SERIOUSLY consider your life as an unmotivated pizza delivery man who feels like a part-time UPS job is going to cut it for the benefits.

SON. YOU need to get your shit together and start shooting for something that ain't going to make 25/hr seem like a lot of money.

'Cause truth be told that ain't shit for a family of 3.

Also YOU NEED to get a paternity test. I'm sorry it's not about trust, it's not about love, it's not about emotions, IT'S about not getting fucked over. With the sexual freedom and promiscuity that women experience these days YOU NEVER FUCKING KNOW. GET this test if she truly loves you she'll understand.

[DrSatanDracula]

Forbiden1:

Satan honor goes along away and has different aspects, imagine waking up 20 years from now knowing you married someone only because of this reason and hate yourself later for doing it, or have the marriage dissolve, it would of all been for an image or a sense of honor that was really masked behind pride. There is no honor in that, and there is no honor in having a baby that wasn't planned. Situations like this are what they are and shouldn't be glorified.

Marriage is itself a tenuous thing in this society. We cannot go into a marriage thinking it will dissolve. Many people get married outside of "shotgun" reasons and still fail. We cannot worry about this.

I also do not think one would hate themselves for doing the right thing. Especially as you now have a beautiful child and a wife. That's some good stuff to begin wtih.

But life is about making choices. It is about taking what life gives you and using that to step up and be a good man. A man of excellence. A superior man. Sometimes that makes hard sacrifices and manning up to things that might be easier to run away from. This dude, Bobbylight, for all his flaws that someone people are making fun of (I am not), even attempted. It is in her hands now, but he did his duty.

You make very good points, but your sense of blind honor is something reminiscent of a quote from the departed. "Im Irish I can live with something being wrong my whole life" - That is definately not the quality of life I want any part of, an I think the consensus would agree.

I have to say dude, that quote is amazingly fitting. This is especially true as I am Black Irish. LOL

But "living with mistakes" and doing the right, responsible thing, is how we become men. It might suck, at times, but it is something we have to do.

[DrSatanDracula]

As to paternity tests, I agree only in the sense that it is important to know. I do not support undue suspicion of any woman (if it is undue). But just as a general thing, yhou want to make sure you're the father. If possible, do it on the downlow.

[Happy Boy]

The paternity test is a tough one, there is no conceivable way to bring that one up without it sounding like he doesnt trust her.

[DrSatanDracula]

Lubaolong:

People like DrSatanDracula are the reason the divorce rate is at 50%.

I think quite the opposite, actually.

If people manned up (or womaned up) and learned how to live a respectbable, decent, good life, they'd avoid divorce more often than not.