Converting Platonic Friends- Lame Update, decent hawt pic - Page 3

Rampage Rua** · 08-19-2008, 10:22 AM

my policy is if i'm getting the friend zone vibe, i just walk away

sure, it's entirely possible to convert, but that's a lot of effort, and most likely i'm gonna run across a girl who's just as hot and is not giving me that friend bullshit

AZGnP · 08-19-2008, 10:24 AM

My current girlfriend started out as a completely platonic friend. We used to work together a long time ago and then she found me on facebook and we used to talk all the time.

I think this kinda helped things move on to the next stage because we were both just bullshitting with each other and got to know each other on a different level than physical attraction or anything else that we think subconsciously about our female friends.

We eventually hung out a couple of times and had a lot of fun and then eventually our conversations started getting deeper and deeper and one night I told her, "You'd make a guy really happy." She said it was sweet and that was that and after a minute she asked if she'd make me happy and I told her yeah probably, still trying to play it cool because I was unsure what to think at that point. I chalked it up to us drinking and we continued to hang out when one night she asked me if I found her attractive. I thought this was one a loaded question because maybe she was trying to woo some other guy so I was honest and I told her I thought she was beautiful (she really is).

Long story short, we hung out a couple of more times, I moved closer to her and I fell hard for her and I just asked her out. I figured at this point there was no reason not to and if she said no, I'd be mature enough to get over it.

The thing about dating a friend is that it doesn't seem like it's going anywhere or that you have feelings for each other because the passion builds more slowly than if you ask a girl at the bar you know nothing about out; but ultimately, you connect on a much deeper level.

AZGnP · 08-19-2008, 10:26 AM

The friend zone is just an excuse that insecure males use to avoid asking their friends out.

I have a lot of female friends, but have only dated or slept with a couple of them.

At the same time, I used to always be very careful not to confuse feelings, mine or theirs, before I act.

DanaWhite · 08-19-2008, 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZGnP

Long story short, we hung out a couple of more times, I moved closer to her and I fell hard for her and I just asked her out. I figured at this point there was no reason not to and if she said no, I'd be mature enough to get over it.

You didn't really finish the story. Did she say no or yes?

AZGnP · 08-19-2008, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZGnP

My current girlfriend started out as a completely platonic friend.

Idk, did she?

dr quincy · 08-19-2008, 10:37 AM

I did it a few times in my younger pre-marriage days. Here's the thing though, in order for it to work ideally you should already have a girlfriend. In this way you will seem desirable and attractive to women.

You and the platonic friend can hang out and you can be your comfortable nonchalant self without any pressure of the boy/girl relationship thing. You and platonic friend hang out and she starts to feel jealous of the other girl.

After awhile start talking to friend about faults of other girl, letting her know you are dissatisfied. Use platonic friend as a shoulder to cry on. Break up with girlfriend. Platonic girl will be there with open arms.

Rampage Rua** · 08-19-2008, 10:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dr quincy

I did it a few times in my younger pre-marriage days. Here's the thing though, in order for it to work ideally you should already have a girlfriend. In this way you will seem desirable and attractive to women.

You and the platonic friend can hang out and you can be your comfortable nonchalant self without any pressure of the boy/girl relationship thing. You and platonic friend hang out and she starts to feel jealous of the other girl.

After awhile start talking to friend about faults of other girl, letting her know you are dissatisfied. Use platonic friend as a shoulder to cry on. Break up with girlfriend. Platonic girl will be there with open arms.

lol...sadly it is true

it's funny how female friends get all jealous and shit all of a sudden when you don't spend time with them because you need to get laid

AZGnP · 08-19-2008, 10:40 AM

I think you're totally right about the non-pressure thing. I'm not sure about the whole having a g/f thing, though. My g/f an I were about 6 or so months off of pretty serious relationships and we talked a lot about the people we met and were trying to date before we developed feelings for each other.

I think something that is essential is that one party can't come into this situation with their mind made up. When my g/f and I started talking, we didn't think of each other in any way other than someone we knew.

Sebchenier · 08-19-2008, 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dane Bramage

Well....you might be good with it if it goes down in ball of flames, but it might turn awkward, or it might be too awkward for her.

Anyhoo, you'll never know if you don't try.

I got with a platonic friend. I have never regretted it. Could'nt be friends with her afterward though. That's the risk I took.

I suggest you key into her signals. If she isn't giving you any, then don't do it. If she's hanging out with you one on one, that's a very good sign that she knows you're safe to be with.

My advice: Don't tell her, show her. Don't blurt out "hey, we should be together as more than just friends."
Kiss her.

QFT
don't waste your time talking about it. If you think it's worth the risk, wait for the right moment and then just go for it.
If you mention it beforehand you come off as someone with little confidence. If you just go for it the worste thing she'll think is you're cocky

DanaWhite · 08-19-2008, 10:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZGnP

Idk, did she?

Oh my bad, I clearly just read your post wrong.

Edit:

Now that I think about it, my girlfriend and I started out as platonic friends. When we were little kids (like 5 years old) we would hang out together. Eventually I guess we each made different friends and stopped hanging out. When we got older (like 16) we became friends again, but we weren't close friends.

5 years later we started to become closer friends. One night we went to visit one of our mutual friends at school for a Halloween party. She was dressed up as a French Maid and right then and there I decided I wanted to be more than friends with her. After a couple more times of hanging out I went for a move and she didn't push me away. We've been together for like 6 months now.