[Snowblind]

Chuck Norris likes Pride because Fedor is the closest thing besides a Nuclear Explosion to being Chuck's equal.

[aichaboomboom]

chuck norris knows whats up for sho. if norris says pride is #1, pride is #1.

[Ache]

A marital expert ? is that a joke ???

[Black Gi]

Originally Posted by mepersoner

# Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

# Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

# Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

# The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

# Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.

# If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

# When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

# Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

# CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

# There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

# Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

# Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.

# Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

# A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

# Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.

# Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

# Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face.

# The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.

# Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

# Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.

# Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

# Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

# Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

# Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Chuck Norris's warm-up exercises.

# Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

# In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

# Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.

# Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

# The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.

# According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American "Trail of Tears" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.

# Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

# Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.

# When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

# There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.

# Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

# Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.

# Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

All good shit, but you forgot to mention, that Chuck Norris doesnt piss up walls he pisses over them.

I dont think any one would deny that Pride is a spectacle.

[RETURN_UK]

God has Chuck Norrises number on speed dial if the devil trys to attack

[Jack Sparrow]

Chuck Norris is kinda god of M.A, if he sais that he can't be wrong
I knew it from the start

[ccl2087]

Originally Posted by KurgaN

Chuck knows what's up:



Source: Ed Fishman, interview on Sherdog front page, http://www.sherdog.com/news/interviews.asp?n_id=6716

Ed might be overdoing the hype a bit, but still cool.

chuck is a pretty with it guy when it comes to mma, so i could see him talking pride up. chuck also has a fighting league that he sponsors on the versus network called the world combat league, the only thing i don't like about the wcl is there is absolutely no ground fighting allowed. but other than that it's pretty cool, if i remember correctly tra telligman is one of the coaches, and i think crafton wallace is one of their fighters

[Oberon]

If Chuck Norris says so...it is so....so the whole UFC > Pride deal is done!

So what are we gonna discuss on Sherdog now??

[JTF-2]

As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.


-Cheers

[Prince Of Space]

I told a very close friend of mine who knows something about marital arts, Chuck Norris,

lolz

BTW the next company Norris talks up I'm gonna be short on their stock

Chuck has the kiss of death