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be at 12% body fat for them to start to show. lower body fat it if you like to look in the mirror.
Train your abdomen as you train everything. If you are going to be dysmorphic, make sure you have everything. And yes, this is gay.
The big question is why train ONLY for looks. People like fat people if they are cool. They will like you as well. If you are not getting action from ladies, it might not be helped by prominent obliques. The cool ladies will figure out you are weak. If you focus on appearance without improving character, smarts.... you are headed down a dark gayish road.
Train because you like it and because it is healthy.
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Remembering Evan Tanner
One's ideology is in direct proportion from one's distance to the problem - unknown
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