Pushed into Grappling or other sports as a child??

Flounder · 12-21-2007, 01:29 PM

I was just listening to a radio show, and one of the guys on there was lamenting that he wishes his parents/father had pushed him into a sport or music or something as a child. As a father of a 2 yo, I've always thought it a bad thing to push you child into these activities. But this statement has me rethinking it.

As a child were you pushed/forced into sports or other activities?? As an adult, do you look back on it and appreciate it, or do you still resent it?? Any other thoughts on the subject? Thanks.

Meegle818 · 12-21-2007, 01:40 PM

i was never...say.."pushed" into doing sports, but it was ALWAYS encouraged by my parents. I mean would you rather have your son sitting in front of the TV or running around outside playing basketball, football, track.

i wished this kind of positive exposure about BJJ/grappling was around when i was a little kid, i would totally have wanted to do it. I did karate but i was really really young and did not enjoy it.

I would try to encourage your child to give it a try, i mean what kid doesn't like to wrestle around anyway...and this way they can get exercise, learn discipline...all the hoopla of doing a martial art. i say encourage him, but never demand he tries it.

Yojimbo. · 12-21-2007, 02:04 PM

I was never pushed into sports, but always did them (rather well I must say) throughout my life, even though I'm not what you would typically call "athletic". I just loved baseball, basketball, martial arts, boxing, all kinds of stuff.

I have a lot of other interests, one being guitar. I kinda was pushed to start playing guitar because my dad played since he was a kid and he never made it, so from a very young age my parents used to talk about how I was going to grow up to be a famous rock star. I started playing a bit at around 5 or 6, learning a few chords and playing different harmonies. At 10 I started playing seriously, and I'm 24 now. I don't play much these days, but I'm still VERY grateful to my dad for teaching me how to play, even if music didn't turn out to be what I wanted for a career. I guess there is a minuscule amount of resentment for the pressure they (probably unknowingly) put on me, but only because I can't help but feel a little bad about myself, like I let them down or something. But I love them very much and they support me in whatever it is I find myself doing, even jiujitsu. They even offered to pay my dues when I can't afford them (I make shit money at work and have to make an hour commute to the gym a couple times a week, coupled with other fun bills that come with living on your own). They know I love jiujitsu and it makes me healthier physically and mentally, so they want me to continue my training.

I think that when I have children, I will just try to bring them to class as often as I can once they are 4 or 5 years old. Let them see me do something that I enjoy and make it a part of their life, even if indirectly. I will just give them exposure to the art and let them choose whether or not it's something they would like to try. Maybe they will grow to love it like I do, and that would make me quite happy

or not, that's fine to. So no, I would not push them into it.

Oshime2 · 12-21-2007, 02:22 PM

I'm very far from having kids but I think that I would try to expose my kids to a bunch of different sports, instruments, activities etc and let them decide what they liked. I imagine if you force your kids into things they get burned out on it much quicker. As long as they had SOMETHING they liked and started doing relatively young, I think I'd be fine with that.

kaboom187 · 12-21-2007, 02:34 PM

I was never pushed into or encouraged into any sports at all. Sports just never came up. I'd have to join on my own, and 'm pretty sure that i never played on a sport team until grade 7, and then again in grade 10. I really wish they had pushed me into some sport, because i'm way behind on the athletic curve.

GroundWorkz · 12-21-2007, 02:42 PM

My son has been doing BJJ for roughly 2 years now and trains roughly 1 or 2 times a week, he also does seasonal sports (which he honestly prefers). After two years my son looks at BJJ as a normal way of life, he doesnt hate it but at the same he isnt thrilled to go. At first, he was (like most of us I guess lol) and now he treats it as a part of every day life. He started when he was 5 and is currently 7.

Most his BJJ classes he's auto pilot, he may learn a new move but he may forget a move. He's never forced to go and recently since I've seen him really -- zone out have asked him if he wants to stay home, he's opted to kick back a few weeks for the Holidays. Yesterday he told me he wants his promotion so hes fired up again for '08.

Kids like things 1 minute and dislike it the next ... just expose it to them. Let them do it and always have a open door.

--

Extra note:

I don't expect him to get really serious in any sports until he reaches the age of 11 or 12. I think around that age we get a competitive urge to be better. As it stands right now my son doesn't have a single competitive urge in him lol. Guess thats good in some aspect but I hope when he's 11,12 or even 13 he gets it.

Graunie · 12-21-2007, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GroundWorkz

My son has been doing BJJ for roughly 2 years now and trains roughly 1 or 2 times a week, he also does seasonal sports (which he honestly prefers). After two years my son looks at BJJ as a normal way of life, he doesnt hate it but at the same he isnt thrilled to go. At first, he was (like most of us I guess lol) and now he treats it as a part of every day life. He started when he was 5 and is currently 7.

Most his BJJ classes he's auto pilot, he may learn a new move but he may forget a move. He's never forced to go and recently since I've seen him really -- zone out have asked him if he wants to stay home, he's opted to kick back a few weeks for the Holidays. Yesterday he told me he wants his promotion so hes fired up again for '08.

Kids like things 1 minute and dislike it the next ... just expose it to them. Let them do it and always have a open door.

--

Extra note:

I don't expect him to get really serious in any sports until he reaches the age of 11 or 12. I think around that age we get a competitive urge to be better. As it stands right now my son doesn't have a single competitive urge in him lol. Guess thats good in some aspect but I hope when he's 11,12 or even 13 he gets it.

I think you hit the nail on the head here. Get them exposed to some stuff and around 11 or 12 when they get that competitive spirit and they will be prepared to dive into what they like. Kinda makes me sad to see parents imposing their will or try to live their failed athletic ventures vicariously through their children. Don't be that guy!

Magooglie · 12-21-2007, 02:56 PM

I did TKD as a kid. I never played any sports like basketball or baseball. I don't regret that. But I agree with GroundWorkz, at 13 kids will decide what kind of activities they want to spend a lot of their time on or pursue in their teenage years and possibly beyond, whether it be a sport, playing an instrument, or some kind of art.

Garrett E. · 12-21-2007, 03:37 PM

Kids cant very well go to a gym and sign up themselves.

My parents were pretty good. They signed me up for TKD as a kid. I went for a couple of years but then i got really bored with it and wanted to quit.

My parents didnt have a problem, so i left.

I'd reccomend having your kid doing BJJ but if they want to stop, just respect their wishes. Your not really pushing them to do anything, conversily, your giving them an opportunity to figure out what they enjoy.

ThinkGreen · 12-21-2007, 04:01 PM

I wasn't pushed to play baseball, but it's not like I voulenteered when I was 4 years old. My parents obviously signed me up and when I decided to stop playing during my sophomore year, they were fine with it. I think it's important to push your kids to play sports, but let them quit when they really want to!